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"What nationality are you?" the ob-gyn asked my husband

...from between my thighs in the delivery room.

That and the raging tide of Numorphan in my veins brought me back to the days when I had had the exact same question.

When I met my husband, most people around him assumed he was black. His skin was cafe-au-lait and his features looked African-American. But I had gone to a very diverse school as a kid, and I had never seen anyone with any degree of African-American heritage who had hair like his. It was stiff, smooth and blue-black. (At that time, it was too short for its natural waves to show up.)

So I asked him one day, and...

..."I'm Hawaiian," he told the ob-gyn.

"Oh really! I'm Indian," said the doc.

"Cool."

This was a welcome distraction from being poked and prodded. What I most remember about giving birth was that I just wanted everyone to leave me alone. Stop checking me, stop feeling me, stop everything. Shut up, go away, turn out the lights. It must have been some primal instinct--your reptile brain doesn't know that those hands are wearing gloves and everything is sterile.

I lost the thread of their talk (Numorphan again) and came back as the doc was cheerily saying something about "...whatever the local brown minority is." My husband was laughing.

A perfectly everyday moment during what was, of course, a perfectly everyday event.

It doesn't feel everyday. Nor should it. The entry into the world of a being who can never leave it again except by death. And no one knows what that end will be.

She was born with her eyes open.

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on October 24, 2007 12:51 PM.

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